Glimmers and Triggers

This is actually about glimmers, not triggers, other than to begin by differentiating between the two. I suspect that more of my readers are familiar with triggers than glimmers. Triggers are relatively inconsequential actions or objects that remind a particular person of something highly negative from their past, causing or ‘triggering’ a negative and/or withdrawal reaction. Glimmers are the opposite — actions or objects that cause a highly positive response, a joy, though not necessarily because of a past interaction. At the risk of seeming that I am promoting commercialization, which I am not, let me describe a few of my glimmers.

I am not a big shopper, though sometimes I see a useful object that I don’t need, but that I am immediately attracted to, and I (self-indulgently) buy it. The three things to be described now each cost less than twenty dollars, so were inexpensive. This small plate from Anthropology, with the three-dimensional radish and butterfly, was among those objects last year. Now, every time I choose to use it for a snack or a piece of toast, I experience a ‘glimmer,’ a wave of good feeling that washes over me. It’s not life-changing, just re-charging.

The second item, bought from TJ Max about two years ago, was these two glasses, each with three-dimensional oranges on it. I didn’t buy a set, only these two. Whenever I choose one for my beverage, again, I experience a little glimmer, a feeling of good surging in me.

The third item, bought last year online, (though not from Amazon, from which I never purchase), was a simple pair of cashmere fingerless mittens, which matches my coat. It felt a bit frivolous to buy them, but they matched my weird coat so closely that I had to. The surprise is that I wear them so often. They’re perfect when I’m driving or being out for a short while. Perhaps part of the reason for the glimmer is that it feels so right that I picked them.

Lest you think I’m simply a ‘materialistic girl’, allow me to describe another kind of glimmer, with a different reasoning behind it. I’m sure you’ve each experienced this: when you see someone unexpectedly or who you haven’t seen in quite a while, something rises in you, a joy, an energy that simply feels good and adds to your own good energy. It may only last a moment, but it’s genuine. Please don’t take this for granted — this kind of glimmer should be revered, cherished, cultivated. Here are my thoughts behind this kind of glimmer, which may initially seem disconnected from this thread.

Einstein, one of my long-time heroes, received the Noble Prize for his observation of light: that it sometimes acts as a particle and sometimes as a wave. It now occurs to me that we, as human beings, also sometimes act as a particle and sometimes as a wave. When we meet up with certain people, sadly, we are as particles that bounce off of each other (like billiard balls.) But with other people, we are like waves and our energy combines, causing an energy increase in both of us. In other words, a glimmer. This results from no intention or action on our part, it simply happens.

So, we need to increase the glimmers in our lives, not to be confused with glitter. Glitter is simply something shiny that takes our attention momentarily, but that gives us no lasting or recurrent joy. There’s nothing wrong with glitter, as long as its use does not prevent us from paying the bills or putting our attention where it should be. It may be true that people who experience triggers in a way that frequently interferes with their life simply need to cultivate glimmers. If you’re just starting down this path, begin by identifying the people and events which are a source of glimmer for you.

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